The people who know me are probably going to laugh at this post because I am basically repeating what I have said many times before. Never again, alcohol is the devil. This time, I feel different in my resolve. I’ll tell you why.
I am a good time girl. I love bars, parties and social events. I’m a retired bartender and there is a different lifestyle that is usually associated with certain professions. Bar-tending, waitstaff, any bar/restaurant job actually, bands and any jobs affiliated with that, certain marketing and promotional jobs. The job location is usually set at a bar or club and many hours there often lead to drinking. Not normal amounts of drink though. It’s ‘normal’ to drink excessively in these professions. Actually it’s encouraged to be honest. (And no Nana, that does not make it appropriate.) It is a hard thing to get a hold of even if you don’t have an addictive personality. It’s kind of complicated to explain now that I’m trying to do it, but just know that there is a different mentality with these groups of people when it comes to drinking (usually).
I have traded this lifestyle in for the parenting lifestyle. It happened slowly over time and after leaving the bartending job it hasn’t been too hard. Just being in that environment takes me back to my good ole’ days of youth and I just want to be a carefree gal again.
Having a hangover when you’re 25 is different when you hit your thirties. Having a hangover in your thirties is different when you have a kid. And having a hangover when you have more than one kid—sucks!! I don’t go out often but when I do, I am usually counting drinks so as not to go over ‘my limit’ because I am so conscientious about not feeling bad the next day. It’s just not worth it to me anymore!! And then comes this past Friday.
I was out for a friend’s birthday and I was hanging out with everybody having fun. Being able to see people and catch up is so exciting and fun for me because my main association consists of my immediate family and a computer. My wonderful hubby was letting me sleep in the next morning, so I knew I had a little bit of an easier day ahead of me. Long story short, that conscientious memory of mine took a break and I totally forgot how bad hangovers can be. And I feel like mine are worse than most people’s.
The next day was horrible. I was so tired and felt nauseous the whole day. I could feel that poison, rotting away my body and taking it’s full 24 hours to do so. I had some family plans Saturday and I had to sit in the car several times and I swear Lance took the extra long, curvy roads. I was car sick. Poison sick. I couldn’t eat anything, couldn’t drink anything….which definitely didn’t help matters. I didn’t even drink as much as I used to but it didn’t matter because my body just isn’t used to it anymore. It’s healthy and when I poison it, it reacts! It made me realize how I truly can’t do this anymore, that it’s unnecessary and only I am left suffering. I’d rather have the flu because at least my body would be building an immunity to something. All a hangover is is self inflicted damage to oneself. Point taken. Lesson learned. (A million times over.)
The reason I really felt bad this time is because I wasn’t participating in the family activities as normal. I played with the kids, but I was sitting the whole time, when we had dinner, I laid on the couch and skipped that part. (Lame!) We had family in from out of town, and I was just out of it and couldn’t take advantage of every minute like I would have. By the way, I’d like to formally apologize to my family for being out of it on Saturday. And I’d like to make a bigger apology to myself. For putting my body through this pain and making my brain go into circles with questions like, ‘Why did I do this again?’, ‘Why did I do that shot?’, ‘Why didn’t I switch to water?’ I mean, I definitely had fun but I didn’t need to overdo it! It’s a fine line.
It’s not the end of the world obviously, but I can’t do that anymore. It’s miserable and it puts a damper on things just enough to make me feel bad. I’m not 25 anymore. I’m not able to sleep the day away anymore and avoid any painful responsibilities. It’s been a long time since this happened and I guess I had to relearn it. I’m not swearing off alcohol or anything, but no more all nighters for me. Back to counting drinks and feeling good the next day. I live a different life now and I can honestly say that I am glad!